I am so stressed. I feel like I am stuck between a rock and a hard place. I feel like no matter what I do, how hard I work, I am never exceeding enough for someone. I try and save money and someone always needs it and when they make empty promises of returning my money, they consider it “rent paid”.
I have no car, no diploma and I am just fucking stuck. I feel inadequate to everyone including myself. I feel like no matter how hard I try to succeed in even a tiny, minuscule step, I am pushed back more and more.
I want to start my life and have my freedom with no fucks given and my middle finger in the air.
But I can’t. Reality sets in and I’m forced to realize that this is it for now.
I try to be positive, I really do. I feel like I’m in a black hole of no return and that in itself makes me feel like scum.
I have a tattoo on my arm from an anonymous quote. It reads: Everything will be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end.
How true those words are. If only I can believe for myself right now.
